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| Coping with disaster |
RECOVERY AFTER DISASTERS
The following article from the US Department of Justice is a very good beginning to understanding
the mental processes that almost all human beings have when faced with sudden and traumatic
disasters. This includes terrorism. The DOJ publishes a handbook on this subject and I am going to
present it here in its entirety. I will add my personal comments as needed, using blue print to avoid
confusion.
The first step on recovery from disasters is getting yourself mentally and emotionally prepared for
whatever situation you will be facing. If you are the leader of a group of people thrown together
by these circumstances, then you need to be aware of what all these people (including yourself)
are going through. You need to recognize what is happening and take steps to bring the group
back to the one goal of SURVIVAL. The DOJ handbook starts now:
Message from the Director
The terrorist acts of September 11, 2001, have deeply shaken our sense of safety, security, and
emotional well-being. Every one of us has been changed forever by this horrible tragedy, but we
are a resilient Nation, strong in our patriotism and determined in our resolve to find ways to cope
with our losses.
It is difficult to try to comprehend these heinous acts that were perpetrated against innocent
people going about their daily business. It is hard to accept the profound sense of loss, and it is
difficult to cope with the raw emotions felt in the wake of this devastating act of inhumanity.
We at the Office for Victims of Crime will never understand the depths of your despair, but we
have relied on the experiences of other terrorism victims and the expertise of mental health, crisis
counseling, and victim assistance professionals to prepare this handbook for you.
Our office grieves with all who have lost loved ones. We pledge our determination to be sensitive
to your needs and to seek justice on behalf of all who were injured or killed as a result of the
attacks on Americans and our country's way of life.
John W. Gillis, Director
Office for Victims of Crime
---------------------------
Coping After Terrorism
The information in this handbook is intended to help you understand your reactions to an act of
terrorism or mass violence. It is not intended to be a substitute for the role of professionals with
expertise in counseling trauma victims.
Nothing in life can prepare you for the horror of an act of terrorism that robs you of your sense of
security and, in some instances, a loved one. No one expects such a thing to happen. Violent crime
is an abnormal event, and terrorism is even more rare. The normal reactions to this type of
traumatic disaster include a wide range of powerful feelings that may feel abnormal to the person
having them or seem strange to those who have not gone through such a disaster. You may feel
like something is wrong with you and that the terrible pain will never ease up.
Recovering from a traumatic event will take a long time and will not be easy. Everyone responds
differently to trauma. No one reacts in a right or wrong way-just differently. It will help your
recovery process if you do not expect too much of yourself and of others.
Reactions to a Traumatic Disaster
Shock and Numbness. At first you may be in a state of shock and may feel numb and confused. You
also may feel detached-as if you are watching a movie or having a bad dream that will not end.
This numbness protects you from feeling the full impact of what has happened all at once.
Intense Emotion
You may feel overpowered by sorrow and grief. As shock begins to wear off, it is not unusual to
feel intense grief and cry uncontrollably. While some parts of our society frown on emotional
behavior, this emotional release is an important part of grieving for most people. It is unhealthy to
hold back or "swallow" your painful feelings and can actually make the grieving process last
longer. If you are uncomfortable with these feelings, you may want to seek help from a counselor
or minister or other victims who understand what you are going through.
Fear
You may feel intense fear and startle easily, become extremely anxious when you leave your home
or are alone, or experience waves of panic. Someone you love has been suddenly and violently
killed while going about his or her daily life. You had no time to prepare psychologically for such an
incident, so you may feel intense anxiety and horror. You may be afraid that the terrorist will
return and harm you or your loved ones again. Crime shatters normal feelings of security and trust
and the sense of being able to control events. Once you have been harmed by crime, it is natural to
be afraid and suspicious of others. These feelings will go away or lessen over time.
Guilt
Victims who were injured in the traumatic disaster want to understand why the crime happened,
and families wonder why they lost a loved one. Some people find it easier to accept what happened
if they can blame themselves in some way. This is a normal way of trying to once again feel a sense
of control over their lives. Victims often feel guilt and regret for things they did or did not say or
do and that they should have protected a loved one better or have done something to prevent his
or her death. Survivors spend a lot of time thinking, "If only I had . . . ." This guilt does not make
sense because the circumstances that lead to terrorism usually cannot be controlled and are hard
to predict. Get rid of imagined guilt. You did the best you could at the time. If you are convinced
that you made mistakes or have real guilt, consider professional or spiritual counseling. You will
need to find a way to forgive yourself. Feelings of guilt can be made worse by people who point
out what they would have done differently in the same situation. People who say such things are
usually trying to convince themselves that such a tragedy could never happen to them.
Anger and Resentment
It is natural for you to be angry and outraged at the tragedy, the person or persons who caused
the tragedy, or someone you believe could have prevented the crime. If a suspect is arrested, you
might direct your anger toward that person. You may become angry with other family members,
friends, doctors, police, prosecutors, God, or even yourself and may resent well-meaning people
who say hurtful things and do not understand what you-as a victim-are going through.
Feelings of anger may be very intense, and the feelings may come and go. You also may daydream
about revenge, which is normal and can be helpful in releasing rage and frustration.
Feelings of anger are a natural part of the recovery process. These feelings are not right or wrong;
they are simply feelings. It is important to recognize the anger as real but to not use it as an
excuse to abuse or hurt others. There are safe and healthy ways to express anger. Many people
find that writing down their feelings, exercising, doing hard physical work, beating a pillow, or
crying or screaming in privacy helps them release some of the anger. Ignoring feelings of anger
and resentment may cause physical problems such as headaches, upset stomachs, and high blood
pressure. Anger that goes on a long time may cover up other more painful feelings such as guilt,
sadness, and depression.
Depression and Loneliness
Depression and loneliness are often a large part of trauma for victims. It may seem that these
feelings will last forever. Trials are sometimes delayed for months and even years in our criminal
justice system. Once the trial day comes, the trial and any media coverage means having to relive
the events surrounding the traumatic disaster. Feelings of depression and loneliness are even
stronger when a victim feels that no one understands. This is the reason a support group for
victims is so important; support group members will truly understand such feelings.
Victims of traumatic disaster may feel that it is too painful to keep living and may think of suicide. If
these thoughts continue, you must find help. Danger signals to watch for include (1) thinking
about suicide often, (2) being alone too much, (3) not being able to talk to other people about
what you are feeling, (4)
sudden changes in weight, (5) continued trouble sleeping, and (6) using too much alcohol or other
drugs (including prescription drugs).
Isolation
You may feel that you are different from everyone else and that others have abandoned you.
Terrorism is an abnormal and unthinkable act, and people are horrified by it. Injury by terrorism
carries with it a stigma for the victim that can leave him or her feeling abandoned and ashamed.
Other people may care but still find it hard or uncomfortable to be around you. You are a reminder
that terrorism can happen to anyone. They also cannot understand why you feel and act the way
you do because they have not gone through it.
Physical Symptoms of Distress
It is common to have headaches, fatigue, nausea, sleeplessness, loss of sexual feelings, and weight
gain or loss after a traumatic event. Also, you may feel uncoordinated, experience lower backaches
and chills/sweats, twitch/shake, and grind your teeth.
Panic
Feelings of panic are common and can be hard to cope with. You may feel like you are going crazy.
Often, this feeling happens because traumatic disasters like terrorism seem unreal and
incomprehensible. Your feelings of grief may be so strong and overwhelming that they frighten
you. It can help a great deal to talk with other victims who have had similar feelings and truly
understand what these feelings are all about.
Inability To Resume Normal Activity
You may find that you are unable to function the way you did before the act of terrorism and to
return to even the simplest activities. It may be hard to think and plan, life may seem flat and
empty, and the things that used to be enjoyable may now seem meaningless. You may not be able
to laugh, and when you finally do, you may feel guilty. Tears come often and without warning.
Mood swings, irritability, dreams, and flashbacks about the crime are common. These feelings may
come several months after the disaster. Your friends and coworkers may not understand the grief
that comes with this type of crime and the length of time you will need to recover. They may simply
think it is time for you to put the disaster behind you and get on with normal life. Trust your own
feelings and travel the hard road to recovery at your own pace.
Delayed Reaction
Some individuals will experience no immediate reaction. They may be energized by a stressful
situation and not react until weeks or months later. This type of delayed reaction is not unusual
and, if you begin to have some of the feelings previously discussed, you should consider talking
with a professional counselor.
Practical Coping Ideas
Other victims and survivors of traumatic disasters who have been where you are have offered
some practical suggestions of things you can do to help you cope and begin to heal:
--Remember to breathe. Sometimes when people are afraid or very upset, they
stop breathing. When you are scared or upset, close your eyes and take deep,
slow breaths until you calm down. Taking a walk or talking to a close friend can
also help.
--Whenever possible, delay making any major decisions. You may think a big
change will make you feel better, but it will not necessarily ease the pain. Give
yourself time to get through the most hectic times and to adjust before making
decisions that will affect the rest of your life.
--Simplify your life for a while. Make a list of the things you are responsible for,
such as taking care of the kids, buying groceries, teaching Sunday school, or
going to work. Then, look at your list and see which things are absolutely
necessary. Is there anything you can put aside for a while? Are there things you
can let go of completely?
--Take care of your mind and body. Eat healthy food. Exercise regularly, even
if it is only a long walk every day. Exercise will help lift depression and help you
sleep better, too. Massages can also help release tension and comfort you.
--Avoid using alcohol and other drugs. These substances may temporarily
block the pain, but they will keep you from healing. You have to experience
your feelings and look clearly at your life to recover from tragedy.
--Keep the phone number of a good friend nearby to call when you feel
overwhelmed or have a panic attack.
--Talk to a counselor, clergy member, friend, family member, or other survivors
about what happened. It is common to want to share your experience over and
over again-again-and it can be helpful for you to do so.
--Begin to restore order in your world by reestablishing old routines at work,
home, or school as much as possible. Stay busy with work that occupies your
mind, but do not throw yourself into frantic activity.
--Ask questions. You may have concerns about what types of assistance are
available, who will pay for your travel and other expenses, and other issues
concerning compensation and insurance. Find out what will be expected of you
in the days to come so you can plan ahead for any new or stressful
circumstances.
--Talk to your children, who are often the invisible victims, and make sure they
are part of your reactions, activities, and plans. Involve them in funerals and
memorials if they want to be involved.
--Organize and plan how you will deal with the media. It may be helpful to
include family, friends, or other victims or survivors in your planning process.
You do NOT have to speak to the media. It is up to you to decide how much,
if any, involvement you will have with the media. Any contact should be on your
terms.
--Seek the help of a reputable attorney if you think you need legal advice. Take
time to make decisions about insurance settlements, legal actions, and other
matters that have long-term consequences.
--Rely on people you trust. Seek information, advice, and help from them.
Remember that although most people are honest and trustworthy, some
unscrupulous individuals will try to take advantage of victims in the aftermath of
a disaster.
--Avoid doing upsetting things right before bed if you are having trouble
sleeping. Designate 30 minutes sometime earlier in the day as your "worry
time." Do not go to bed before you are tired. Write down your fears and
nightmares. Put on quiet music or relaxation tapes. If you still cannot sleep, do
not get mad at yourself and worry about not getting sleep. You can still rest by
lying quietly and listening to relaxing music or by reading a good book. If your
sleeping problems continue, you may want to see your doctor.
--Find small ways to help others, as it will help ease your own suffering.
--Ask for help from family, friends, or professionals when you need it. Healing
grief and loss is similar to healing your body after an illness or accident. Just as
there are doctors and nurses who are trained to help heal the body, there are
professionals who are trained to help people recover from loss and cope with
emotional pain.
--Think about the things that give you hope. Make a list of these things and turn
to them on bad days.
It is important to remember that emotional pain is not endless. It does have limits. The pain will
eventually ease, and the joys of life will return. There will be an ebb and flow to your grief. When it
is there, let yourself feel it. When it is gone, let it go. You are not responsible or obligated to keep
the pain alive. Smiles, laughter, and the ability to feel joy in the good things of life will return in
time.
Victims are forever changed by the experience of terrorism. They realize that although things will
never be the same, they can face life with new understanding and new meaning. Many things have
been lost, but many things remain. Overcoming even the greatest tragedies is possible and can help
bring about change and hope for others.
Finding Help
Whatever you are facing or feeling at the moment, it is important to remember that each person
copes with tragedy in his or her own way. Trust your own feelings, that what you are feeling is
what you need to feel and that it is normal. Do not act like things are fine when they are not.
Healing begins by talking about what happened with people you trust-people who support you
without being judgmental or giving unwanted advice about what you should do or how you should
feel.
Most people find it helpful to talk with a professional counselor who has worked with other crime
survivors. Sometimes just a few sessions with a trained counselor will help you resolve the anger,
guilt, and despair that keep you from recovering. Also, talking with other victims of violent crime
may help you feel better understood and less alone.
---------------------------
Victim Benefits and Assistance Contacts
Office for Victims of Crime Victim Assistance Center
1-800-331-0075 (inside U.S.) 00-1-414-359-9751 (call collect outside U.S.) 1-800-833-6885
(TTY)
Assistance Offered: Emergency transportation, information, and referral
Eligible Victims: All victims for information and referral, transportation
assistance for victims not covered by airline, military, or other sources
Bureau of Justice Assistance Public Safety Officers' Benefits Program
1-888-744-6513
Assistance Offered: Financial and emotional assistance
Eligible Victims: Families of federal, state, and local public safety officers
(police, fire, EMS) killed in the line of duty
The following article from the US Department of Justice is a very good beginning to understanding
the mental processes that almost all human beings have when faced with sudden and traumatic
disasters. This includes terrorism. The DOJ publishes a handbook on this subject and I am going to
present it here in its entirety. I will add my personal comments as needed, using blue print to avoid
confusion.
The first step on recovery from disasters is getting yourself mentally and emotionally prepared for
whatever situation you will be facing. If you are the leader of a group of people thrown together
by these circumstances, then you need to be aware of what all these people (including yourself)
are going through. You need to recognize what is happening and take steps to bring the group
back to the one goal of SURVIVAL. The DOJ handbook starts now:
Message from the Director
The terrorist acts of September 11, 2001, have deeply shaken our sense of safety, security, and
emotional well-being. Every one of us has been changed forever by this horrible tragedy, but we
are a resilient Nation, strong in our patriotism and determined in our resolve to find ways to cope
with our losses.
It is difficult to try to comprehend these heinous acts that were perpetrated against innocent
people going about their daily business. It is hard to accept the profound sense of loss, and it is
difficult to cope with the raw emotions felt in the wake of this devastating act of inhumanity.
We at the Office for Victims of Crime will never understand the depths of your despair, but we
have relied on the experiences of other terrorism victims and the expertise of mental health, crisis
counseling, and victim assistance professionals to prepare this handbook for you.
Our office grieves with all who have lost loved ones. We pledge our determination to be sensitive
to your needs and to seek justice on behalf of all who were injured or killed as a result of the
attacks on Americans and our country's way of life.
John W. Gillis, Director
Office for Victims of Crime
---------------------------
Coping After Terrorism
The information in this handbook is intended to help you understand your reactions to an act of
terrorism or mass violence. It is not intended to be a substitute for the role of professionals with
expertise in counseling trauma victims.
Nothing in life can prepare you for the horror of an act of terrorism that robs you of your sense of
security and, in some instances, a loved one. No one expects such a thing to happen. Violent crime
is an abnormal event, and terrorism is even more rare. The normal reactions to this type of
traumatic disaster include a wide range of powerful feelings that may feel abnormal to the person
having them or seem strange to those who have not gone through such a disaster. You may feel
like something is wrong with you and that the terrible pain will never ease up.
Recovering from a traumatic event will take a long time and will not be easy. Everyone responds
differently to trauma. No one reacts in a right or wrong way-just differently. It will help your
recovery process if you do not expect too much of yourself and of others.
Reactions to a Traumatic Disaster
Shock and Numbness. At first you may be in a state of shock and may feel numb and confused. You
also may feel detached-as if you are watching a movie or having a bad dream that will not end.
This numbness protects you from feeling the full impact of what has happened all at once.
Intense Emotion
You may feel overpowered by sorrow and grief. As shock begins to wear off, it is not unusual to
feel intense grief and cry uncontrollably. While some parts of our society frown on emotional
behavior, this emotional release is an important part of grieving for most people. It is unhealthy to
hold back or "swallow" your painful feelings and can actually make the grieving process last
longer. If you are uncomfortable with these feelings, you may want to seek help from a counselor
or minister or other victims who understand what you are going through.
Fear
You may feel intense fear and startle easily, become extremely anxious when you leave your home
or are alone, or experience waves of panic. Someone you love has been suddenly and violently
killed while going about his or her daily life. You had no time to prepare psychologically for such an
incident, so you may feel intense anxiety and horror. You may be afraid that the terrorist will
return and harm you or your loved ones again. Crime shatters normal feelings of security and trust
and the sense of being able to control events. Once you have been harmed by crime, it is natural to
be afraid and suspicious of others. These feelings will go away or lessen over time.
Guilt
Victims who were injured in the traumatic disaster want to understand why the crime happened,
and families wonder why they lost a loved one. Some people find it easier to accept what happened
if they can blame themselves in some way. This is a normal way of trying to once again feel a sense
of control over their lives. Victims often feel guilt and regret for things they did or did not say or
do and that they should have protected a loved one better or have done something to prevent his
or her death. Survivors spend a lot of time thinking, "If only I had . . . ." This guilt does not make
sense because the circumstances that lead to terrorism usually cannot be controlled and are hard
to predict. Get rid of imagined guilt. You did the best you could at the time. If you are convinced
that you made mistakes or have real guilt, consider professional or spiritual counseling. You will
need to find a way to forgive yourself. Feelings of guilt can be made worse by people who point
out what they would have done differently in the same situation. People who say such things are
usually trying to convince themselves that such a tragedy could never happen to them.
Anger and Resentment
It is natural for you to be angry and outraged at the tragedy, the person or persons who caused
the tragedy, or someone you believe could have prevented the crime. If a suspect is arrested, you
might direct your anger toward that person. You may become angry with other family members,
friends, doctors, police, prosecutors, God, or even yourself and may resent well-meaning people
who say hurtful things and do not understand what you-as a victim-are going through.
Feelings of anger may be very intense, and the feelings may come and go. You also may daydream
about revenge, which is normal and can be helpful in releasing rage and frustration.
Feelings of anger are a natural part of the recovery process. These feelings are not right or wrong;
they are simply feelings. It is important to recognize the anger as real but to not use it as an
excuse to abuse or hurt others. There are safe and healthy ways to express anger. Many people
find that writing down their feelings, exercising, doing hard physical work, beating a pillow, or
crying or screaming in privacy helps them release some of the anger. Ignoring feelings of anger
and resentment may cause physical problems such as headaches, upset stomachs, and high blood
pressure. Anger that goes on a long time may cover up other more painful feelings such as guilt,
sadness, and depression.
Depression and Loneliness
Depression and loneliness are often a large part of trauma for victims. It may seem that these
feelings will last forever. Trials are sometimes delayed for months and even years in our criminal
justice system. Once the trial day comes, the trial and any media coverage means having to relive
the events surrounding the traumatic disaster. Feelings of depression and loneliness are even
stronger when a victim feels that no one understands. This is the reason a support group for
victims is so important; support group members will truly understand such feelings.
Victims of traumatic disaster may feel that it is too painful to keep living and may think of suicide. If
these thoughts continue, you must find help. Danger signals to watch for include (1) thinking
about suicide often, (2) being alone too much, (3) not being able to talk to other people about
what you are feeling, (4)
sudden changes in weight, (5) continued trouble sleeping, and (6) using too much alcohol or other
drugs (including prescription drugs).
Isolation
You may feel that you are different from everyone else and that others have abandoned you.
Terrorism is an abnormal and unthinkable act, and people are horrified by it. Injury by terrorism
carries with it a stigma for the victim that can leave him or her feeling abandoned and ashamed.
Other people may care but still find it hard or uncomfortable to be around you. You are a reminder
that terrorism can happen to anyone. They also cannot understand why you feel and act the way
you do because they have not gone through it.
Physical Symptoms of Distress
It is common to have headaches, fatigue, nausea, sleeplessness, loss of sexual feelings, and weight
gain or loss after a traumatic event. Also, you may feel uncoordinated, experience lower backaches
and chills/sweats, twitch/shake, and grind your teeth.
Panic
Feelings of panic are common and can be hard to cope with. You may feel like you are going crazy.
Often, this feeling happens because traumatic disasters like terrorism seem unreal and
incomprehensible. Your feelings of grief may be so strong and overwhelming that they frighten
you. It can help a great deal to talk with other victims who have had similar feelings and truly
understand what these feelings are all about.
Inability To Resume Normal Activity
You may find that you are unable to function the way you did before the act of terrorism and to
return to even the simplest activities. It may be hard to think and plan, life may seem flat and
empty, and the things that used to be enjoyable may now seem meaningless. You may not be able
to laugh, and when you finally do, you may feel guilty. Tears come often and without warning.
Mood swings, irritability, dreams, and flashbacks about the crime are common. These feelings may
come several months after the disaster. Your friends and coworkers may not understand the grief
that comes with this type of crime and the length of time you will need to recover. They may simply
think it is time for you to put the disaster behind you and get on with normal life. Trust your own
feelings and travel the hard road to recovery at your own pace.
Delayed Reaction
Some individuals will experience no immediate reaction. They may be energized by a stressful
situation and not react until weeks or months later. This type of delayed reaction is not unusual
and, if you begin to have some of the feelings previously discussed, you should consider talking
with a professional counselor.
Practical Coping Ideas
Other victims and survivors of traumatic disasters who have been where you are have offered
some practical suggestions of things you can do to help you cope and begin to heal:
--Remember to breathe. Sometimes when people are afraid or very upset, they
stop breathing. When you are scared or upset, close your eyes and take deep,
slow breaths until you calm down. Taking a walk or talking to a close friend can
also help.
--Whenever possible, delay making any major decisions. You may think a big
change will make you feel better, but it will not necessarily ease the pain. Give
yourself time to get through the most hectic times and to adjust before making
decisions that will affect the rest of your life.
--Simplify your life for a while. Make a list of the things you are responsible for,
such as taking care of the kids, buying groceries, teaching Sunday school, or
going to work. Then, look at your list and see which things are absolutely
necessary. Is there anything you can put aside for a while? Are there things you
can let go of completely?
--Take care of your mind and body. Eat healthy food. Exercise regularly, even
if it is only a long walk every day. Exercise will help lift depression and help you
sleep better, too. Massages can also help release tension and comfort you.
--Avoid using alcohol and other drugs. These substances may temporarily
block the pain, but they will keep you from healing. You have to experience
your feelings and look clearly at your life to recover from tragedy.
--Keep the phone number of a good friend nearby to call when you feel
overwhelmed or have a panic attack.
--Talk to a counselor, clergy member, friend, family member, or other survivors
about what happened. It is common to want to share your experience over and
over again-again-and it can be helpful for you to do so.
--Begin to restore order in your world by reestablishing old routines at work,
home, or school as much as possible. Stay busy with work that occupies your
mind, but do not throw yourself into frantic activity.
--Ask questions. You may have concerns about what types of assistance are
available, who will pay for your travel and other expenses, and other issues
concerning compensation and insurance. Find out what will be expected of you
in the days to come so you can plan ahead for any new or stressful
circumstances.
--Talk to your children, who are often the invisible victims, and make sure they
are part of your reactions, activities, and plans. Involve them in funerals and
memorials if they want to be involved.
--Organize and plan how you will deal with the media. It may be helpful to
include family, friends, or other victims or survivors in your planning process.
You do NOT have to speak to the media. It is up to you to decide how much,
if any, involvement you will have with the media. Any contact should be on your
terms.
--Seek the help of a reputable attorney if you think you need legal advice. Take
time to make decisions about insurance settlements, legal actions, and other
matters that have long-term consequences.
--Rely on people you trust. Seek information, advice, and help from them.
Remember that although most people are honest and trustworthy, some
unscrupulous individuals will try to take advantage of victims in the aftermath of
a disaster.
--Avoid doing upsetting things right before bed if you are having trouble
sleeping. Designate 30 minutes sometime earlier in the day as your "worry
time." Do not go to bed before you are tired. Write down your fears and
nightmares. Put on quiet music or relaxation tapes. If you still cannot sleep, do
not get mad at yourself and worry about not getting sleep. You can still rest by
lying quietly and listening to relaxing music or by reading a good book. If your
sleeping problems continue, you may want to see your doctor.
--Find small ways to help others, as it will help ease your own suffering.
--Ask for help from family, friends, or professionals when you need it. Healing
grief and loss is similar to healing your body after an illness or accident. Just as
there are doctors and nurses who are trained to help heal the body, there are
professionals who are trained to help people recover from loss and cope with
emotional pain.
--Think about the things that give you hope. Make a list of these things and turn
to them on bad days.
It is important to remember that emotional pain is not endless. It does have limits. The pain will
eventually ease, and the joys of life will return. There will be an ebb and flow to your grief. When it
is there, let yourself feel it. When it is gone, let it go. You are not responsible or obligated to keep
the pain alive. Smiles, laughter, and the ability to feel joy in the good things of life will return in
time.
Victims are forever changed by the experience of terrorism. They realize that although things will
never be the same, they can face life with new understanding and new meaning. Many things have
been lost, but many things remain. Overcoming even the greatest tragedies is possible and can help
bring about change and hope for others.
Finding Help
Whatever you are facing or feeling at the moment, it is important to remember that each person
copes with tragedy in his or her own way. Trust your own feelings, that what you are feeling is
what you need to feel and that it is normal. Do not act like things are fine when they are not.
Healing begins by talking about what happened with people you trust-people who support you
without being judgmental or giving unwanted advice about what you should do or how you should
feel.
Most people find it helpful to talk with a professional counselor who has worked with other crime
survivors. Sometimes just a few sessions with a trained counselor will help you resolve the anger,
guilt, and despair that keep you from recovering. Also, talking with other victims of violent crime
may help you feel better understood and less alone.
---------------------------
Victim Benefits and Assistance Contacts
Office for Victims of Crime Victim Assistance Center
1-800-331-0075 (inside U.S.) 00-1-414-359-9751 (call collect outside U.S.) 1-800-833-6885
(TTY)
Assistance Offered: Emergency transportation, information, and referral
Eligible Victims: All victims for information and referral, transportation
assistance for victims not covered by airline, military, or other sources
Bureau of Justice Assistance Public Safety Officers' Benefits Program
1-888-744-6513
Assistance Offered: Financial and emotional assistance
Eligible Victims: Families of federal, state, and local public safety officers
(police, fire, EMS) killed in the line of duty
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